Christians Against Poverty - Monthly Advice Column
By Christians Against Poverty on 06/03/2023
Debt advice
Miles Picknell - Manager of the Christians Against Poverty Debt Centre,
Upminster
How to preserve your relationship through money worries
Money is commonly identified as one of the main reasons for conflict within relationships, and rising costs are making things even more difficult. We spend our money on what we value, but what we value is often different to the person next to us – including our nearest and dearest. We’re offering some small actions you can take today to help prevent friction and foster healthier and stronger relationships to weather those storms.
Learn your differences
What do you do when you want to save but your partner likes to spend? A gentle way to open up a conversation could be through suggesting you take an online money personality quiz. These can help you identify your different attitudes toward money, describe the strengths and challenges of each, and offer tips on how to best manage your money traits.
Talk about solutions
Couples often argue over money worries because there’s been a lack of communication over household finances. By having regular conversations about where you’re at financially as a couple, you can begin to consider different solutions to the problem. Seek free, expert help if you’ve fallen into unmanageable debt.
Share responsibility
In many relationships, one partner may hold more responsibility or control over the household finances. Whilst this isn’t a bad thing, it can create problems if the power over your shared finances leans too far towards one person. For relationships where one partner is always making financial decisions, can you come up with a system where each person has an equal say?
Involve your children
Lots of parents and carers will naturally want to protect their children from being exposed to the anxiety and worry that debt and money problems can create. Whilst we’re not suggesting you place every fact and issue you’re facing on the table, involving your children into some of the decision-making process, like deciding what to spend your budget on, can actually draw you together as a family through working together.
Get support
Debt help charity Christians Against Poverty (CAP) reports that nearly half (43%) of their clients said they put off getting free debt help because they didn’t think anyone could help. It’s important to know that support is available and in the UK, there are several free debt help organisations. Visit capuk.org or call 0800 328 0006 to find out more.